A friend of mine has a job in a local community. She is head of Human Resources. She has lots of transactions with her leader on a daily basis. The leader happens to be quite aggressive. Last week my friend fainted from stress and was taken to hospital with a stroke that paralysed half of her face. My friend is very dutyful and may be a sensitive woman but this incident is without discussion pure terror. The incident happened at work during daytime. And this is not the first time employees meet terror from this leader. Local newspaper has had several articles about the horrible leader. No colleagues stod up helping my friend. Nobody did a thing. Lots of people knew about it and nobody stopped the leader from repeated actions. This terror is not OK This is not OK at all. We can’t accept a leader with a temper like this, a behaviour this aggressive and a series of consequences like this. I suggest that time has come to introduce a leaders license. I know that lots of companies are able t...

Coaching Cubes with 36 questions on 6 different theme cubes: Explore new areas of discussion with Coaching Cubes  Colorful foam dice that feature positive coaching questions and they are great for promoting discussion and unblocking stuck conversations with your coachees. One of the most effective techniques to help someone develop their own thinking is to ask them questions. Good questions prompt new thoughts, bring previous experiences to bear on present dilemmas, shed new light on the issue, and prompt plans for action. This activity consists of six coloured, soft cubes with positive coaching questions on them. The cubes are designed to be rolled as dice, with each cube having its own theme relating to the coaching process. The Coaching Cubes follow this model. The PRISMM COACHING CUBES Model The PRISMM coaching model combines systemic consulting, appreciative inquiry and positive psychology to create a powerful coaching process. A colourful, tactile, innovative addition to any ...

Colourblind® is used to simulate modern day communication when a shared visual reference is not always available e.g. communicating via text / email / telephone, or even face-to-face, and using active listening and questioning skills for mutual understanding: The original Colourblind ® game relies on participants being blindfolded and asked to describe abstract shapes in their hand to figure out, as a team, which two pieces from a complete set of 30 have been removed. This requires active listening and questioning skills, as well as problem solving and team leadership in order to come to a consensus. Whether new entrants to the workforce or seasoned Executives, everyone can benefit from taking some time to further develop their communications skills - whether it is active listening, communicating abstract and difficult concepts to others, or indeed ensuring that the message being received is that which was intended! All of these are required to be successful both individually and as a ...

Why Team Small Talk is vitally important to working life: Team Small Talk is important at work - actually, it's an important and essential part of work. It enables us to find common ground and shared interests. It improves active listening skills. It helps us build muscles to overcome social discomfort and it improve spontaneity. Team Small Talk sparks collaboration, improve creativity, innovation and performance. Team Small Talk boost energy and make everybody feel 'seen'. It lays the groundwork for transitioning into more serious, deeper topics which require a greater degree of psychological safety. Here are 7 groundrules for making Team Small Talk work. But before this you have to come closer to all your colleagues in order to give these groundrules a chance to work: Be friendly. Be enthusiastic. Be curious. Be helpful. Send the right signals with face. Send the right signals with body. Send the right signals with voice. How to learn to become a Team Small Talker Practic...

FISH! testing: Test yourself with these 28 different FISH! practice questions. You can also use the questions with a colleague and have a great conversation while you fill out the form. How Well Do You live The Practices? This self-assessment tool gives you a quick scan of how well you are living the FISH! practices with your coworkers and customers. Take it again in the future and see where you’ve made changes. Use the following scale to respond to each statement: 1 Never. 2 Rarely. 3 Sometimes. 4 Consistently. Circle the number with a red pen describing the situation NOW. Circle the number with a green pen describing the situation 14 DAYS LATER. Circle the number with a blue pen describing your WISH. Be There I focus on others when they are talking to me.  ❶      ❷      ❸      ❹ I listen to understand, not just to reply.   ❶    ❷    ❸    ❹ I quiet my judgments about others when talking ...

Who Are You Being?: One of the most profound statements in FISH! comes when one of the fishmongers, says, “It’s about who you’re being while you’re doing what you’re doing.” “Doing” is necessary, but it’s the mechanical side of our lives.  It’s easy to get wrapped up in our doings, especially all the tasks we have to complete. When that happens, we get stuck on autopilot and react without thinking. We feel rushed, impatient. Sometimes it feels like we are human doings rather than human beings. When we say “being,” we mean making a conscious choice to take a stand for something. It requires thinking about and taking responsibility for how you react, how you treat others, how you treat yourself. “Being” is the most important commitment there is. When we focus on being who we want to be, it influences everything we are doing. We are free to deal with difficult people and situations more calmly. We are able to notice when we are not being who we want to be. The principles of FI...

Lots of leaders have shown the 18 minute film FISH! to their teams and done nothing after that. Silence. Never say anything about it again.  Yes, it's a funny film. It is full of important messages. We should all learn from it. Can't you see that you should all take it in and start behaving in a proper way? With any film you use there is a BEFORE, DURING and AFTER. Before You have to make a plan with what you are doing. Why would you like to use this film in particular? Does it really underline the messages you want to highlight? Does the film carry stuff enough so you can renovate your company culture? Or do you just want to use the film as an icebreaker and thats it? Make up your mind!  You are in a position to do important things in the days and hours before you show the film: Tell your team what they can expect. Invite your team to this extraordinary experience. When they are all seated appoint a few to count or spot important things. Refer to the analysis that points out ...

The best leader exercise in the world: Boss Watching: Leading through relationships Pat O`Donnell of Aspen Skiing Company says: 'The favorite hobby of employees all over the globe is Boss Watching'. The moment you are appointed leader, every word you say, every eyebrow you raise and every smile you smile will be weighed on a golden scale. If you lose your temper with one of your employees, the whole team will think, 'When will I get the same treatment?' If you are in a hurry and walk past your employees without greeting them, they will wonder if you care about them. Every time you sincerely recognize your employees for their contributions, you send the signal that you care about them and that they matter to you. Because you are the manager, your employees will invent a story about you inside their heads every single day. How do you want this story to sound? Really? This exercise is for you who would like to control whats going on inside their heads. And you can control ...

The leader can deliver this workshop in a few hours:  Every team member and every leader needs praise and acknowledgement. But how much? Is it 10 times a day? Is it 100 times a day? Deliver this workshop and agree how and how much! If you have a 'democracy' (psychological safety) in your workplace that allows everyone to speek and ventilate ideas and thoughts and problems - try out this praise-workshop. Here comes a plan: Start by telling everyone how important this workshop is Next - deliver this example: Ask everyone to stand up and enter the floor. Now distribute a blank A4 cardboard with two holes in top plus one meter of a string to every team member - including yourself. Ask them to fasten the cardboard on their backs. Make sure that everyone has a pen to write with. Tell them that you are all going to write praise on backs - as many as they can in 3 minutes. Be strict about time and end the exercise on time. Allow them to finish writing if they have started. Thank them a...

Have this great workshop with only a quote:  Yes, quotes like this below really makes a difference. But only a small one. Very small to be honest. But this quote could be the intro to a workshop that involves all team members. If you have a 'democracy' in your workplace that allows everyone to speek and ventilate ideas and thoughts and problems - try it. Here comes a plan: Start by showing the quote. Tell your team that great customer service is essential to becoming a world class company. Ask: So what do you see when you read this quote? 10 usable statements Acknowledge every message by saying: Good point. Very accurate. I like it. Now tell them that you are all going to work with how the service culture really works in your company. The workshop must end up with 10 statements ready for use by everybody. Workshop target The target of the workshop is to find answers and actions to: This is how we like it. This is how we prefer to deliver service. This is the behaviour we must a...

Your questions shape your life:  I once learned that 'The questions you ask determine the answers you get.' At that time, a whole lot occurred to me. Just think that the questioner has so many options to control the answerer and thus the answers. Ask stupid questions and you get stupid answers. Ask technical questions and you will get technical answers. Ask closed questions and you will get YES and NO answers. Ask negative questions and you will get negative answers. Example: 'How bad can our climate go?' Answer: 'Yes, it's going to go all the way.' Example: 'What's the worst that can happen?' Answer: 'That you meet 7 violent men on a dark night.' Example: 'So what, mollusk?' Answer: 'Hold the bucket you clammy cousin.' When setting up solution-oriented answers, the questions sound like this: 'How do you think we can get started with climate-friendly thinking?' 'What must each of us do to look after our country...

Eradicate prejudice at work, school and places where people meet:  We are all surrounded by prejudices, attitudes and assumptions about groups of people. The prejudices assume something untrue or something unsubstantiated. Over time, the prejudices become widespread and remain unchallenged. Prejudices can be both negative and positive, such as: 'Sellers are quick to respond and lie so loudly.' 'Warehouse people are troublesome and inflexible.' 'Asian children are good at math.' 'Finnish people go with a knife.' One way to eradicate prejudices is to talk about them. It sounds very simple, but it doesn't have to be. Following this article is a link to a dialogue exercise that any manager, teacher or trainer can use when there is a need to shed light on prejudice. Imagine that all your participants talk to 1 other person for approx. 3 minutes about 1 question. It is called 'brief encounters'. First, one asks a question, which the other answers. ...

What is a cool moral and how do you create one?  First, an introduction to 'moral'. Next, something about how to get good morals. And finally something about how to maintain the moral that makes everyone (colleagues, managers and customers) comfortable. First, introduction to moral A moral is like the human immune system. The immune system is what ensures that we have a defense against diseases. Morale is also resilient and can withstand a myriad of unforeseen and planned events. A bad moral can rarely withstand just a few sick calls, a small lack of goods and a short-term IT breakdown. The reactions of the employees are violent and dramatic. The veneer is thin. The fuse is short. The nerves are on the outside of the clothes. The stronger a moral the better the defense against all challenges - canceled orders, pandemic, new and complicated laws, climate change and hacker attacks. 'Morality' means manners, character and orderly and correct behavior in the face of, for ex...

Have this great workshop with only a quote:  Yes, quotes like this really makes a difference. But only a small one. Very small to be honest. But this quote could be the intro to a workshop that involves all team members.   If you have a democracy in your workplace that allows everyone to speek and ventilate ideas and thoughts and problems - try it. Here comes a small plan: Start by showing the quote. Tell your team that wellbeing at work is essential to productivity and customer satisfaction. Ask: So what do you see when you read this quote? 10 usable statements Acknowledge every message by saying: Good point. Very accurate. I like it. Now tell them that you are all going to work with how the environment works. The workshop must end up with 10 statements ready for use by everybody - especially the leader - to follow. Workshop target The target of the workshop is to find answers and actions to: This is how we like it. This is how we prefer the climate. This is the behaviour we ...

Do you have to play at work or is it just bullshit?:  When you're at work, you don't play. There is no time for that. It is unproductive. Play is nonsense.  This is not correct: At work you have to play. There must be time for play. Play is very productive. Play must also be silly. Play leads to something serious. Play is the way to explore several possibilities - alone or together with several colleagues or the whole team. Here comes, for example, a vital game. A game that is so proven that success is guaranteed. It requires no aids. It requires no handouts. It does not require a stopwatch. It only requires a leader who can start it, explain it and review it with the team. Here comes the game in all its simplicity: Ask your participants to stand in pairs facing each other with a distance of 1 meter. They will now try a game that is about counting to three. The game gets a little more difficult along the way. But first one partner must say 1. Then the other partner says 2. The...

What does it take to get people to change?:  What you're about to see is real. And yes. There is a link for a video on YouTube further down. Real kids doing real things. Just thought you should know.  So here's a question: what does it take to get people to change? I'm not talking about their socks and underwear, but change behavior? Especially when it's hard? For example Every year, close to 100,000 people die from hospital acquired infections. That means people got sick—at the hospital! And it turns out, one of the main culprits is hand hygiene. That means just getting people to wash their hands could save lives. ‘All Washed Up’ is a short film about the methods used when you have to present a change to a group of people of young kids that faces a big puzzle. After the puzzle they have to wash their hands before enjoying a cupcake. Watch the film 'All Washed Up' right HERE  or copy this link  https://youtu.be/osUwukXSd0k The method is to use no less than 4 to...

Count down from 10:  Try involving your participants, your audience or your friends in a countdown before the important start. It can be the lighting of a Christmas tree. It can be the start of the fight. It can be the opening of a bottle of champagne before the cork pops. A countdown is an unassailable and active way to involve everyone. Anyone can join. You simply have to introduce the countdown: 'We count down from 10. We begin: 10, 9, 8...' When you introduce and start with a loud 10 yourself, everyone follows along. But why is it good to use a countdown? First , it is a reasonable demand. When it is a reasonable demand, then everyone follows along. As the host, you introduce that something a little out of the ordinary is coming. The 'host' tells it. It's not just another repetitive action. We don't count down from 10 because we have to brush our teeth for the third time that day. We do it because what needs to happen is a rarity. Second , the countdown make...

Six positives to one negative  We all need more positive news Why have I checked 4 daily news apps to find out which one made my life a little easier and a little more optimistic? Because it is a well-kept secret that we humans need optimism, faith in the future and positivity. However, I came to look far for the optimism in the four news apps. I checked 4 danish news sites: Berlingske, Politiken, TV2 and DR on Tuesday 29 June 2021 at 14:00. The survey was relatively simple. How many positive and how many negative headlines had these sites formulated? The 4 sites contained a total of 271 stories. Most of them were about the same thing, but had completely different headlines: Berlingske had 65 headlines. Of these, 20 were positive and 45 negative = 30% positive news. Politiken had 76 headlines. Of these, 26 were positive and 50 negative = 34% positive news. TV2 had 70 headlines. Of these, 24 were positive and 46 negative = 34% positive news. DR had 60 headlines. Of these, 33 were po...

Find common ground in 15 minutes:  If you want your team to be a community, ie. be connected by something you have in common, something you agree on, something you have the same point of view on or something that interests you, then start this exercise. Being connected by something you have in common means that it has to be a little unusual. It is not enough to have two eyes. But if several people have one green eye and one brown eye, then you have something in common. The common thing must therefore be somewhat rare. Somewhere in Copenhagen there is an apartment complex where only former employees of The Royal House. They have in common that they have all served various Danish royals throughout their lives. Elsewhere in Copenhagen, there is an apartment complex where only former actors live. They have in common that they have all appeared in theaters and in films throughout their long lives. Community can also be togetherness. This is usually the case in a workplace. When the comm...

My advice to you is: Take these 5 cool coaching questions:  There are conversations for every occasion. Here I will describe a few of them that you will need the most. Some people think that conversation is pure talk that leads to nothing. But that is not correct. If you are a group that has to solve a problem, it typically starts with talking. Talk turns into conversation.  And conversation leads to plan and action. There is small talk for a start Here they talk about weather and wind and health and children and grandchildren. Small talk is good for relationships. You have seen me and I have seen you. It is in line with waving and smiling at each other. Then there is Team Talk Which can be used when the whole group is gathered for, for example, a weekly meeting. Everyone gets to say something. Because everyone means something. Because everyone has something to contribute. Because everyone has an idea or two for a solution. Team Talk is, for example, 'the round table'. This is...

Eliminate the awkward silence and instead have some dignified conversations about the deceased:  Since there is rarely a leader of the funeral ceremony the whole thing becomes very quiet and serious and there is no room for conversation. It is of course very different from funeral to funeral. But there will always be people present who are neither family nor friends, but who are 'stakeholders'. Those who only have a small contact surface or know the deceased from a small angle, e.g. work, sports, school, etc. Therefore, one is content to show one's respect, calmly and dignified. But in reality, the deceased might want people to meet and have a nice experience. And in fact, the funeral is the deceased's last 'management task'. It is the last time that the deceased gathers these very people around him. The deceased would probably like it to be fairly pleasant and educational. New conversation cards For this purpose, I have formulated a series of conversation cards...

There is Small Talk and there is Team Talk. Here comes a 'what is what' explanation?:  When we meet with family and friends at the dining table, a conversation ensues where the host or the elder takes the lead, which sometimes shuts down the entire dinner party. Once in a while, the unique thing happens that everyone around the table speaks the same amount. Then there is both laughter and answers in the air. It all happens randomly and without control. It is usually problem-free. It is small talk about small and large topics. It's close to cozy. I have tried to be at a birthday party, where my waitress told me about her exciting job as a secretary for the well-known danish TV producer and master of our childhood Ingvald Lieberkind. And I have tried having a potato grower at the table. And there I listened to new and old stories about both potato species and cooking methods. But these must be described as small talk. Small Talk with content. Because there is also Small Talk ...

I can't find my will - where did I put it?: The headline puts the matter a bit on the edge. The will is not a gland or a special center in the brain. But the will is good to get in touch with if one day you sense that it is a bit difficult to get started with anything. There are people who, without warning, start playing the piano. They find a teacher. They practice. And then all of a sudden they play for us all. There are people who start to learn a new language, to ride a mountain bike, to collect ... I myself have been practicing to become a better badminton player. There are many things to practice. To pose correctly. To move systematically. Practicing the basics. Being able to vary. To be able to mask. To hit hard. To strike softly. To endure to win. To bear to lose. It's a long catalog. One stroke I have worked on refining is the serve. A good start is crucial to whether the ball gets into play at all. That's why I've been practicing the serve and it works really ...